YWAM Denver

If you ask just about anyone who has been through YWAM Denver what they're feeling right now, "shock", "numb", "anger", "disbelief", and "hurt" are all words that would come up. Not the normal response you would get from a bunch of missionaries, but in light of Sunday morning's shootings, it seems reasonable.

If you've been there, you know that we consider each other family. Not the type that you call on holidays and visit every few years out of obligation ... the kind who visits each other's house at any time of year just because you can, who show up when a baby is born and will call if they think you might be struggling with something. The kind that drop a line periodically just to say "Hi" and who you can laugh with over shared experiences in spite of being thousands of miles away.

I didn't know Tiffany or Phil ... they came after my time in Denver was officially over. I'd met Dan on mobile team and followed Nick's leading to poke at him hard to do a DTS in Denver. I didn't really know Chuck ... only met him a couple times when visiting friends before leaving for Africa.

But I do know many of the people who are on staff that are struggling through the loss of peace and the sense of being in a "safe place" on the YWAM Denver campus. I know the leadership there well, and I can tell you that to them, they've lost a son and daughter at the hands of one of their own.

At this point, I'm not sure that I knew Matt (the shooter). His name sounds really familiar to me, but I can't figure out if he is the person I'm picturing in my mind. I really hope he's not. I can't imagine the torment that must have been going on in his head and heart to bring him to the place of thinking of hurting as many people as he wanted to. Reports say that he was asked to leave staff in Denver in 2002 (the year I did my DTS) and sent antagonistic correspondence to the base after that. If I think with the mind of someone who has a warped sense of understanding, I can understand his targeting YWAM ... I don't understand his loading up on ammo and walking into New Life Church.

There is no guarantee that as we serve God and trust Him in this life, that we will be safe, protected from harm and have life easy. There is still evil at work in this world. People still have free will. The enemy still lies, and we choose to believe him.

In the end, I hold on to the scripture that many from our base have been clinging to and sharing - a verse that we clung to when Elly died in 2004 - "We are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved." (Hebrews 10:39)

God is good, even in the midst of loss and turmoil.

I'm praying for you, my YWAM family - prayers for peace, joy in the midst of pain, that the Lord would be your comforter, that your love for one another would see you through, and that the world would see and hear and put their trust in Him because of your example.